January 4th, 2010
Randomess 2010
I'm not blogging much but that doesn't mean I won't be spamming randomness from time to time.
BREAD
I dream of an evasive bread one delightful afternoon. Siesta time is
bliss, yes, but dreaming of bread that doesn't want to be taken to the
counter to be payed for, taken out and get devoured by human is
disturbing indeed.
I have a favorite bread shop here named BREAD TALK. The layout of the
place is open, always bright and spacious. Oh so very clean (aside for
some crumbs left on some platters) because the food are left out in the
open for the costumers to chose freely.
I dream of wanting a certain bread, but whenever I would put it in my
tray, it disappears. After a while, it disappears again and again even
if I know I was squeezing it, holding firmly so it won't go away. But
it never stayed for long. In my dream, the layout of Bread Talk was the
very opposite from reality: dirty, old, cluttered. I should've known
something was weird, but my main focus was to get the bread. Until I
woke up, it remained evasive.
When I remembered this dream, I thought that maybe it's saying
something to me. When I researched on the net, it says that bread
actually is a good symbol, a positive symbol, even sometimes
symbolizing spiritual growth. But the bread in my dream was
unreachable, avoiding me, so does that mean I'll have bad luck? Even
worse, will my life turn upside down because I lack spirituality?
DETERMINATION
I told myself I'll lose weight this year.
No seriously, I marked this date to be the start, and so far I'm doing
a good job. Though I have to remind my mom to lessen my rice for lunch.
I have to cut everything down and start exercising. I'm not even trying
to be thin, I just want the flabs to be gone, particularly those around
the middle, and I'll be damn happy.
I want this kind of figure back:
Taken I think five years ago, and I never appreciated it.
Damn, after years of teasing, the mockery finally got to me.
So maybe consistency is something I have been lacking for, maybe for
life? Is it a trait? Hopefully not. So while I was looking through a
stack of planners a while ago, I really wanted to replace the one I had
now for the bigger, grander one. I can always do it, and never mind the
efforts I've gone through preparing that planner, but I thought if I
could drop things so easily in the middle, I'll never be able to stand
up for things that I don't only want to archive, but because they'll
bring me to places, put me to places, I can only imagine for now.
Impulse is another enemy. This is a dominant trait of an Aries, but I
figured I can't use that excuse forever, so I might as well fix my life
and use that trait well. It's not always a bad thing; not always.
So control! Conquer!!
My student told me that if I would be able to do one thing for 21 days
straight, I'll be able to change my life. I'll try. I pray that I'll
even remember trying.
GAMBARE! AJA!
SHINee
Well, this is not really a big deal, maybe just musings of a fangirl?
I was hurt, I guess, when a friend of mine told me she hates SHINee
because they are trying to be like DBSK, or trying to be as big as DBSK.
I'll argue with that a bit and even drag the boys down in the process.
They have a LONG WAY TO GO.
In tagalong, "Marami pa kayong kakaining bigas" baka kaban pa mga bata.
Performance wise, hosting wise, singing wise and choreography wise,
they need to improve still, a lot. Performing live is still not their
forte and the songs tended to get eaten because they also needed to
focus on the dancing. This should be both given in excellency. But they
are young, very young. Experience would still teach them more so I
think people should wait for that first. Just give them a chance to
prove themselves since they have the potential to really make it big.
Fanbase wise, Super Junior would even eat them.
Even if they are young and cute and always nodding to the point that
you'll think they look obediently stupid, they're still adjusting. And
we all know their not saints, they have their own diva-ness.
So there. I wasn't annoyed, really. Just a bit hurt. I don't want any
of my fandoms to be taken the wrong way, even if my reasons won't be
understood in the end, at least I did my job to defend how I see them.
And just because no matter how silly it sounds, fandom makes me happy.
Of course the yaoiness are the main culprits and thank goodness they have talent.
And so because others take them as underdogs, I shall love them more.
*HUGSTHEBOYZ*
and PS. KEY (of SHINee) DANCING
TO 4minute's "MUZIK" WAS SO DISTURBING. HIS EXPRESSION, CHEST PUMP AND
HIP SWAYING WERE ALL TOO GOOD AS A WOMAN TO EVEN REMEMBER HE'S A GUY.
HE DANCED TOO SEXY TO TAKE HIM AS STRAIGHT. And I already noticed this
when they danced to "Gee" and "Tell Me Your Wish" before.
OH KEY.
OH KIBUM, you break my heart. If you are gay for Minho, Taemin or Onew, I would accept.
But if you're all diva and gay, well, spare me the heart break. *sniff*
SLEEP
I need that.
Nuff said.
Chow.

